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Day Two

#81
[quote="Karl Jak"]
Face to Face
#09 Samus Aran & #21 Gildarts vs #13 Strazio Rockwell & #46 The Rock, vs #35 Wartortle

The newly formed duo of Samus and Gildarts made their way through the city.

“Well look what we have walking down the street,” a voice called out to them, prompting them to spin to confront the pair of muscled men staring at them. “Couple of jabronis walking around like they own the place,” The Rock declared as he jabbed an elbow into Strazio’s side.

“…Yea,” Strazio shot back halfheartedly as he squeezed the piece of lumber between his hands. It’d been a while since the Defender of Darkshire had seen a fight, and he didn’t like the hardware the pair of primes had on them.

“You take care of the skinny one in the ridiculous costume,” the Rock said as he rushed Gildarts, leaving Strazio creeping toward Samus with his 2x4. The bounty hunter reacted by swinging up the flak cannon and releasing a burst of molten bits that would have torn apart his face had he not managed to throw himself flat on the ground. Strazio rolled over in time to see the flash of blue as the turtle came waltzing out of an alley and started firing at the woman.

With a grunt, Samus twisted and fired a round of flak as the nails punched through her armor. The smug grin on the Pokémon’s face faded away as the blast caught him across the chest and face. Wartortle hit the ground with a wet smack of bloody skin on pavement and made no immediate efforts to move. Turning her attention away from the turtle, Samus ducked to avoid the piece of lumber, but as she tried to bring the cannon to bear on Strazio, the warrior knocked away her hand and slammed his forehead into her helmet, denting the material and cracking the visor.

A few feet away, Gildarts ducked a fist and swung with his gunblade, trying to tear apart the Rock’s belly. The superstar hopped back and lifted an eyebrow in response. “I’m going to take that, shine it up real nice, and shove it straight up your candy ass!” With a grunt, the wrestler shot forward and grabbed for his opponent’s weapon-wielding wrist. Gildarts winced as the fingers crushed around his wrist, causing him to lose his grip on the gunblade. A beat later, Dwayne struck him with a clubbing blow across the side of the head.

Gildarts reeled backwards, and before he knew it, the Rock sprung forward. Slinging his foe's left arm over his back, the Rock slid his right arm across Gildart’s chest and grabbed his shoulder. Stepping forward, the wrestler put a hand on Gildart’s back and snickered as he picked up his foe. After kicking out one of his feet for flair, the Rock took another step and fell forward, crashing Gildart’s down onto the street with enough force to fissure the concrete. The other prime let out a grunt as the Rock rolled onto his chest and hooked one of his legs into the air.

Somewhere, a voice counted.

“1… 2… 3!”

A bell rang as the Rock shoved off of the grounded prime and looked down at him. “New Tag Team Champions, bitch,” the wrestler said as a pair of gold-plated championship belts appeared on his shoulders. With a smirk, the Rock turned around, thrust a belt at Strazio, and the two were off like bandits.

Groaning as she pulled off her damaged helmet, Samus turned to look at Gildarts, who was slowly rising to his feet. “What just happened?” The bounty hunter asked.

“…I think we lost our championship?”

#21 Gildarts PINNED


Gildarts got Rock Bottom’d – Minor Injury (+2 Damage)
Samus’ helmet got smashed – Story Injury (+0 Damage)
The Rock sweat a little – Story Injury
Wartortle got hit in the face with flak and regrets involving himself in these shenanigans – Major Injury (+8 Damage)
[Image: KarlSig.jpg]

#82
There was a beep.

And then there was silence.

Erza leapt to her feet as her allies and the campfire jolted out of existence. The forest was still there, albeit in a different formation of some sort, and her magical hammer and basic supplies remained at her side as they had been. But everything else was simply gone.

"Harry? Samus? ...MICKEEEEY!" Head tilted back, she let out a heartrending screech. Surely if any of them were nearby they would have heard... But no. Nothing. She was alone again, as she hadn't been since the beginning of this goddamn competition before meeting her newest allies... and friends. She fell to her knees, hands on the ground, and sat there for a moment, tears nearly reaching the surface of her one natural eye. "Pazo..." She whimpered. "Pepsi guy..."

Well, this was just the reality of the situation. It was a giant match to the death, and no cheerful facade of friendliness would change that, try as she might. Returning to her feet, she took in her surroundings for real for the first time. An ocean. More forest. Great. No particularly iconic buildings or anything to find her way with. Well, I guess that's it then. She wiped the sole tear from her eye, resolve now strengthened. I guess I'll just have to go find them.

Erza began the trek away from the coast. That was the only way they could be, of course - Areas to the sides may no longer be safe, and the ocean route certainly wouldn't lead anywhere. It was certainly reminescent of the first day again - Though her weapon shoulder was heavier and bag shoulder lighter. [i]Shit, that's right, I'm out of water. I'll need you again pretty soon, humanoid Pepsi can." She was mostly sated, as she'd happily eaten and drunk at her final meal with her new friends, but that wouldn't much help her much in the morning.

Or if she got burned again. But she didn't like to think about that.
[Image: Erza_kicks_Happy.gif]

#83
Doc scrambled to his feet. All he saw was a flash of light, and his collar was heating up, then vibrated, then they... changed? No, they disappeared. No, that's not right either.

Outside. That was unusual. He could've sworn he was inside the mill maybe seconds ago. The sun was down, which was good for sneaking around. It was notso good for staying sheltered, and warm, in this weather. Though the storm had ended a while ago, the rain was still soaking into the dirt. The resulting mud was... Well, at least Doc's coat wasn't so bright white anymore. Trouble was, he had been in the Omniverse for a few months, and failed to see even one place that would have a decent laundry machine.

"Jak?" he called out, [color#808080]"Aero? Delsin?"[/color]

He stood up and did his best to brush off the mud from his jacket and scowled.

"You know, there's a chance I'm back in Cumberland, which means..."

He whirled around and drew his katana. "Friendly family ambush!"

Crickets chirped somewhere. There were no deadly robot animals. No boxing-glove-rocket goat head. No bowling-ball-of-dynamite-hippo butt. Not even a single birthday edition jack-in-the-box.

"Okay, no ambush," McNinja muttered, "That's-that's cool. You know, I'll just... turn around over here!"

He whirled around again, waving his katana again. Still no deadly robot animals, still no ninja family members. Come to think of it, no katana either. He had just been waving a stick from the ground.

"Okay," Doc sighed, "I'm still in the Abyss, aren't I?"

He heard Karl Jak's voice in his head, telling him his location.

"Thanks, Karl!" Doc shouted, "Thanks for separating me from my allies and shelter! Thanks for taking me away right when I was getting cozy!"

"You know, you probably don't be wanna be shouting that so loud," the voice in his head said.

"It's a ploy," Doc internally monologued, "to get people to think I'm defenseless, then HWA! I pull out my katana."

"Friend-o, it is actually useless to lie to me. It is not possible. I am a voice in your head. You shouted just 'cause you were angry at Karl," the voice snapped, "And that's not a katana, that's a twig."

Dr. McNinja sighed. He knew that the voice in his head, even though it was only a coping mechanism for all the PTSD he had developed from the chaos he lived through his entire life, and it had no substance in any sense, was right.

"Yeah, yeah," Doc grumbled.

"Good-o! Now grab your bag, and let's find us some shelter and victims!" the voice chirped jubilantly.

"Man, Jak and Delsin were way better company."

"What do you mean? I was always there."

"See? They never said creepy stuff like that."

"Hey, careful about talking to me too much. It's just gonna get into Deadpool mode, and we already have someone playing Deadpool," the voice chided.

"What are you talking about."

"Good," the voice mumbled, "Not breaking the fourth wall. That's good. Wait, I'm doing it, aren't I? I'm gonna shut up now."

Finally. Dr. McNinja breathed deeply through his nostrils, and let out a sigh. He closed his eyes and felt the frosty dew refresh his lungs. Outside was nice, actually. A little chilly, but nice. Speaking of chilly, unless he was planning on catching something nasty, Doc had to find somewhere warm to stake out for the night. Somewhere warm and safe. He took out his map and shrugged.

"You know, that looks like a lovely safe place. There will probably be all sorts of death-traps there and I will almost definitely not go through their and make it alive. But hey, I could always use more supplies, and there might be some useful stuff there yet."

He finished that bottle of water from earlier in the day. Despite his ninja metabolism allowing him to survive without food or water for longer than usual, he was still feeling extremely hungry, even after that MRE he-

"Wait," Doc mumbled, "Did I ever eat that? Or... No, I never ate it."

Quote:http://drmcninja.com/archives/comic/5p31/

Grumbling, he started sloshing along the mud as he headed towards his new destination.
[Image: 665000_mcninja_by_cavenglok-dch0qt5.jpg]
Odd hours. Call for appointment.

#84
Jon grunted in surprise as he tumbled and skittered across the soil, the sudden change of incline of the ground beneath him sweeping him from his feet. He rolled for a few moments before he pulled himself back to his feet, keeping the bow slugged under his arm as he rose to a standing position.

Hazel orbs swept around, first directing upward toward the vast, changing sky. An orange hue had dotted the horizons and flared the clouds above him. The tide of evening had struck. The bastard took a deep breath as his eyes looked about for any sign of movement or life. But... nothing.

He was... alone?

What had happened back there? King Gilgamesh, himself and Victor had all made the joint decision to head for the package that was being dropped off, with the well-muscled, behemoth of a man who'd saved the trio back atop the mountain choosing to tag along with them. Whether for mutual benefit or for his own gain, Jon Snow didn't dare to inquire. As they travelled, though, they soon crossed paths with a familiar face who desired the very same; a face that was familiar to Jon, at least. Sasuke Uchicha, the blue-dressed shinobi Jon had met and been forced with all those days ago in the Nexus. Snow couldn't help but feel it was more Sasuke's fault than his own he was here in the Abyss, but he shelved that thought at the back of his mind as their two groups parleyed. The ninja-boy had made fast friends and connections with others, and was joined with some loud-mouthed turtle creature, a scarred guy in rags and some madman dressed all in red. With their connections in mind though, and the King using his typical guile to win them over, four soon became eight, and their objective was set; retrieve the "furbie" and let nobody else that wasn't them lay a hand upon it.

There was opposition, though, as they expected. Perhaps the weirdest and most alien creatures Jon had seen... some tiny snake child creature, a small pink-haired child who lacked a worrying amount of emotion, some teenager in a straw hat, and a auburn-haired man who looked all too familiar for Jon's liking and tastes. Gildarts.

Jon wasn't sure whether the sorcerer saw him, but he didn't get a chance to call out and keep their two groups from clawing into one another. Before he knew it, full of battle broke out, and Jon was given little time to protest as the pink-haired child came running at him with some sort of shield. The bastard was able to fend her off well enough, though she'd manage to latch onto him with her inhuman tentacles and take a good chomp right out of his head. Gilgamesh was able to save him before she was able to tear any flesh away, though her teeth had left a bit of a marking at the top of his forehead, one that blood still trickled from now.

And then, with a flash of light and a still beep, Jon was whisked away almost through thin air, and now... here he stood.

But where was here? Where was Sasuke and his lot? Where was the King? Where were his allies?

"Your grace...?" Snow called out for the King, but no answer came. "Victor? Sasuke?!" Jon persisted in calling out the names. A breath of hopelessness escaped him as still, no voice called back.

A huff of pessimism escaped Snow's breath. He truly was alone, yet again.

He trudged forward with ample caution, keeping his bow unfolded and tucked under his arm, just in case. He pinned his gaze straight ahead. A dense forest.

More forest? the bastard rolled his eyes. But it was still scarcely day out, and even all in black he still felt quite naked and visible. He made steady pace for the trees ahead, vanishing off into the woodlands.

Jon had no idea whether Gilgamesh, Sasuke or even Victor were still out there, but it looked like he'd be finding his own way, now.
[Image: tumblr_nzzfidB5IX1tcnpluo4_1280.png]

#85
Jak was taking a bit of a drink in the Mill with his new friends Delsin and Dr. Mcninja and Aero and they were just chatting about their lives and things were actually starting to look cozy for the four of them... Then something happened...

Jak felt his collar blink... and he stood "What in the Precursors?!" Before He could reach for Delsin and the Good Doc, he disappeared....This had to be some cruel joke... Right? Karl had pulled his friends and allies right away from him.

He was alone...again...

Jak gritted his teeth "Delsin! Doc! Aero!!!!"

He carried his supplies with him and he held his arm again. The good doc had at least took the time to numb the pain of his arm that that pokeman had done to him.

However, he had people on his shoulders. He had to do this... for Damas...for Daxter... for all his friends. He squeezed his fist and tried to go dark but the collar prevented him from doing it.

Jak took some wet dirt and wiped his finger across his face. No longer would Jak be family friendly, it was time to play big or go home.
[Image: oNAS6Nu.png]


[Image: Darkdata.png]Jak/Mar- Dynamite Kid/ DA 2018" (Translated text)[Image: hVDTXBF.gif](Thanks Ezzy!)

The Infamous Dynamite Kid- Sasuke

DA 15
DA 16'
DA 17'
DA 18' 

#86
Face to Face
#34 Erza Scarlet & #23 Guu vs #30 Vincent Valentine

Vincent Valentine had been separated from his allies for a few hours when he stumbled across the red-haired woman and the little creature that seemed to be the source of Gilgamesh’s rage and frustrations. Holding onto his final Molotov cocktail, the ex-Turk crept upon the pair. It was clear that the smaller one was still wounded, or she was at least in pain. The two didn’t speak as they tried to travel quietly toward whatever destination they’d mark on their maps. Vincent hadn’t seen them together at the last fight, so they must have been some sort of alliance made out of desperation.

The pale prime considered the same course of action before releasing the Molotov cocktail.

For the second time since her arrival in the Abyss, Erza Scarlet became the centerpiece of another fiery conflagration. The woman grit her teeth as she dove forward, trying to quickly kill the flames as Guu turned and unwillingly absorbed a kick from Vincent to the face. The pink-haired girl hit the ground, and despite the fact that she felt like hell, she turned her focus to extinguishing herself.

That left Vincent free to let out a sigh as the air around him started to swirl, and a red aura formed around his battle-ravaged body. Rushing forward, the pale prime failed to reach Erza before she activated her own power up, and in a flash of light, her normal attire was replaced by something that at least fifty percent of the viewing audience would find much more appealing. Now deck out in her ‘Flight Armor,’ a motley assortment of cheetah-print pieces of armor and tight, revealing clothes, Erza Scarlet dashed forward and cracked Vincent across the skull. The ex-Turk fell to the ground and grabbed the closest thing he could find—a rock. Rolling away from a boot being thrust down at his head, Vincent got to his feet and cracked the woman in the skull with the stone, knocking off one of her cheetah-print ears in the process.

Before he could deliver another strike, a Vibranium shield crashed into his shoulder. The ex-Turk didn’t have a chance to react to the initial attack, because Erza brandished the same hammer from earlier and released a bolt of lightning that struck Vincent in the chest and sent him a safe distance from the pair of women.

“Let’s go,” Erza muttered as she turned to make sure Guu was all right. “The others are out there still.”

Erza used Tier 1 Transformation Flight Armor (-1 SP)
Vincent used Tier 1 Transformation Chaos Cloak (-1 SP)

Guu added some extensive burns to her laundry list of source of agony – Minor Injury (+2 Damage)
Erza got additional burns and abashed in the face – Minor Injury (+4 Damage)

Vincent suffered a shoulder wound and a cracked skull. This second lightning strike will also cause his heart rate to become irregular, until he suffers from cardiac failure and dies in 48 OOC hours – Mortal Injury (+5 Damage)

The Molotovs have been used up
[Image: KarlSig.jpg]

#87
Harry didn't know what exactly this girl was, and maybe he shouldn't have been helping her. After all, this was blood sport. She'd entered, probably of her own free will, and probably not for a personal score like he had. But all that went by the wayside the second he'd heard the tiny voice from inside the sphere of tentacles. She sounded just like he imagined Maggie might, if she was hurt and alone and scared. He'd seen his daughter like that, but she hadn't been able to talk.

It was the memory of that night in Chichén Itzá that made him resolve to help her. After the bandages were applied, he stood there, coat draped around his shoulders and completely shirtless at this point. The couple remaining scraps went in his duffle bag and he pulled out the map and compass. "So, if you want your wizard's advice, we're going to need water. We're about here." He showed the little girl the map and indicated their space on it. "Just a short walk there, we have a river." He moved his finger a short distance to point to the line of blue.

The girl's voice was weak when she responded; it was apparent that, while he'd soothed a little of the pain, she was still in agony. "OK, mister Wizard." She started floating in the direction he'd indicated, but Harry easily took the lead again, hefting the BFG and scanning the area ahead of them like Murphy had taught him cops did.

"Call me Harry, alright?" The wizard tried to keep his tone up, but he couldn't exactly keep himself from muttering to himself, "Not sure what kind of wizard I am on this island."
[Image: u17lb3R.gif]

#88
Face to Face
#33 Jon Snow & #43 Sasuke Uchiha vs #41 Aero

Aero had been having a pretty decent experience so far, and with things the way they were, he didn’t expect much to change. He’d manage to escape the initial fire-fights, and then he’d found a place to shack up with some scrubs whenever the whole thing turned into the worst rendition of West Side Story he’d ever heard of.

He hadn’t expected the teleportation trick from Karl Jak. He had just expected to waltz back to the crew at the mill and tell them he’d gone off on a nice stroll. Now that he had a real weapon, he had a little more freedom to make his own decisions. If he could play his cards right, he might just land something big, and then he could make a name for himself the proper way.

The thoughts brought a grin to Aero up until the arrow sank into his shoulder.

“Damn it!” The blue-haired man shouted as he found the Power Pole and thrust it into the brush in front of him. Knowing he wouldn’t hit someone at first, he grit his teeth and swung the extended weapon side-to-side, hoping to spook out whoever was trying to put some metal through his eyes. Before he had a chance to solve that mystery, someone shot him with a flamethrower, and Aero’s day went from ‘pretty aight’ to ‘utter shite.’

Spinning quickly as the flame burned his flesh, the prime retracted the pole and swung it toward his other attack, who was far more visible than the archer. Sasuke grimaced as the enchanted wooden pole smashed down onto his foot, but rather than cry out, he simply fired another stream of flames at the prime.

As Aero desparately tried to think a way out of this situation, an arrow punched through the back of his head and out through his forehead.

#41 Aero DEAD
25 Primes Remain


Sasuke got his right foot smacked, it’ll be pretty sore – Minor Injury (+2 Damage)

The Power Pole is there, and the Plastic Bag is in Aero’s bag – decide who gets what.
[Image: KarlSig.jpg]

#89
“We actually fucking won, hell yeah!” I shouted and offered a hi-five to my companion. He flashed me a toothy grin and returned my hi-five. We had made our ways to a picnic bench outside of town and were enjoying a victory meal. The championship belt seemed to fit me perfectly and in a moment of cheer I had clipped the gaudy thing around my waist.

“Of course we did, the Rock N’ Rock Connection is the ultimate tag-team duo!”

The combination of nearly eating a blast of flak and actually winning a fight pumped me full of adrenaline and I shouted in excitement. For the first time since coming to this damn island I actually felt great. Well I felt great until I felt a line of blood run down the bridge of my nose. Oh yeah, I had hit that chick pretty hard with my forehead. I felt my blood-matted hair and tried to find the cut. I winced when my hand touched a decent gash “fuck.” The Rock glanced over at me and said “did they get you?”

“No, I got myself. I got a bit too zealous and headbutted that chick in the armor. The Rock chuckled “you’ll be alright, it’ll take more than a little scrape to beat our tag team” I nodded and wiped away the blood with my forearm. We threw our trash into a nearby waste-bin and began to walk. The Rock seemed to know where he was going so I follow the muscle-head. Blood kept running down my forehead and into my face every few minutes. The adrenaline had faded and my head felt like it had been hit with a bat. Just how hard did I hit that women? I asked myself and held a hand up to my head. Every stepped shot a nail into my head and I grit my teeth trying to bear the pain.

“You okay?” The Rock asked.

“Yeah... My head just hurts” I groaned.

He looked at me a raised an eyebrow over his shades “well cupcake you need to walk it off and fast.”

Ignoring his playground insult I asked him“Why? You got something in mind?”

“Our next match is coming up soon, and we can’t let down the millions and millions of our fans!” He looked out into the wilderness as if expecting a crowd of spectators to start cheering. I shook my head, he was right now was not the time to be a bitch. My grip tightened on the 2x4 and I swung it half-heartedly, feeling the familiar weight. If this crazy bastard can keep fighting, than so can I. Even with his impressive stature and stamina I would fight my hardest to keep up with him and not be dead weight.

“Where are we going?”

He pointed off into the distance and I followed his finger to the top of a nearby mountain. My legs grew sore just thinking about the hike up that bastard. Before I could protest he started speaking “that mountain will be the perfect setting for our next bout! The Mountain of Rock, the people’s mountain!” He was as excited about this as a child is about getting a toy on their birthday. Even though I thought it was a horrible idea, how could I say no to the big brute?

As far as I knew neither Ganon or Gilgamesh had fallen. There was no way that I would lose to either of those two. My boundless anger distracted me from my headache and I found myself gripping the 2x4 tight enough to dig my nails into the wood. My greatest weakness was also my greatest strength, anger. Anger permeated my entire being, even in moments of cheer and happiness the seething rage continued to smolder in my heart. Without this rage, without this hatred I had no drive and no purpose. I needed it and it guided my actions whether I wanted it to or not and now it was driving me to survive and outlast the competition. As long as I was still breathing, as long as my anger still burned there was no way I would lose to those two.
[Image: StrazSig.png]

[Image: DarkshireBadge.png][Image: DarkshireDefenseBadge.png][Image: SecondarySaga.png][Image: HerosGraveyardBadge.png]

#90
”All for you, me dear,” the mercenary cooed as he brushed the Furby’s faux-fur with his forearm; the blood from his wound painted the toy in a deep crimson. ”All for you.”

Did he miss his team—Warpool? Sure. Did he care enough to pout over it?

Deadpool took his index and poked the toy in the tummy. It blinked, and then opened its beak-mouth: “I love you,” it replied, pointing its ears, then flattening them.

The toy’s words answered the question: no.

Even the mercenary’s mangled mask could not disguise the wide grin that stretched from ear to ear. ”Oh, I love you too, Furbypool. All you need is some black stuff around your eyes and you’d like just like me!”

The last twenty-four hours had been the most hectic on the island—met a Wartortle, persuaded a King into coughing up a weapon, even had Vincent’s writer replace his water with piss—but his inner fourth wall knew things would only get stranger (by now if you weren’t aware Karl Jak was a maniac, you were foolish). And if the strange toy in his hand was any indication of his forthcoming luck then he would welcome all the weird fuckery brought his way.

The mercenary took one last deep gaze into the Furby’s eyes, blew it a kiss, and then stuffed it half-into a belt pocket. It was time to move. Like he told Vincent, stay somewhere too long and become the scraps for another survivor; Deadpool would not be scraps for no woman or man (so much so that the double-negative was necessary).

He grabbed the handle to his new shovel lodged into the dirt and lifted off of the tree he sat against. For a moment, his fatigue nauseated him, but with a deep inhale and exhale he managed to quell it . . . for now. It was uncertain how long Karl’s collar could delay the decay (another clever rhyme he conjured on the fly), but the mercenary was not going to complain . . . whenever the powers ceased. Shit, they got him this far, and that was thanks enough.



Oh, Baron, we all know you’re the one that comes up with the clever sayings. Hell, you come up with everything. I’m just a pawn in the grand scheme of literature role-playing.



As he made his way through the shrubbery, plowing it aside with his shovel, the sun began to cross over to the west part of the island, dipping under the peak of the mountain—Day 3 was nearing. From his last count, he still had two MRE meals available, one bottle of pure water (thanks Mark/Vincent, you dick), and the things he scavenged in the Diner. It was enough to get him through Day 3, but with his growing fatigue, not much longer after that. He was going to need more protein.

Sneekt, sneekt!

The mercenary’s eyes darted to the right. ”Did I hear an onomatopoeia closely resembling Wolverine’s patented one?! He doubted a srhub like the one he stared at could house a man of Wolverine’s stature, but he did hear something.

The bush quivered, making a sound eerily similar to pompoms, and not long after, a rat scurried out from between two of the bush’s slender trunks. It’s eyes were big, black, and bold, carrying the vermin equivalent to scared-shitless. With another whimpering sneekt, sneekt!, the creature headed towards the closes tree, but as it rested its first little hand on the base of it, it paused and curved its neck back to glance at the mercenary.

”Hi little guy,” Deadpool greeted. He waved a palm at the rat.

“Sneekt, sneekt!” the rat replied in a jubilant high-pitched tone. It removed its hand from the tree and headed towards the mercenary, almost in a gallop.

”Oh shit!” Deadpoole exclaimed. The rat drew closer; Deadpool had to act fast! He picked up his leg and as the vermin got within personal space, and slammed his boot down on the disgusting creature’s neck and back. The rat squished under his sole with a yelp and crunch!



You saw that, dude—the fucking thing was headed right for me. I had no choice, man. Rabies is a helluva disease dude, and especially without my Healing Factor. Noooooo bueno.

Also, on the bright side, I got dinner now!




He reached down and picked scraped the rat from the ground; blood leaked from its mouth as the mercenary gripped it in his hand. Food problem solved.

“I QUIT!” squeaky voice roared through the forest, sending Deadpool’s eyes drifting left. The voice was familiar—one he heard from countless hours of Saturday morning Disney Channel watching.
Someone was near. Very near.

”A racist, possibly?” He slung the shovel over his shoulder and trailed off from his path, into the depths of the forest.
Maneuvering under a few low-hanging branches and through a grove of all hemp plants, he made his way closer to the voice. No more words were emitted to guide him, but the mercenary did not need anymore; he passed through the last bunch of tangled hemp and surveyed the ebony mouse like a lioness would prey, from behind the closest tree.



I guess we’re leaving out the part where I picked a branch? To the reader: I grabbed like a handful of bud before exiting heaven.



It was Mickey Mouse—the Disney goldenboy. Except he was all alone, and grieving, in the middle of a stomped-down path. The mouse grasped the collar around his neck and began to pull away it away from his small neck.



Mickey has no neck. Google image it. Anyway, I think this is where his post leads into mine.



”Fuck,” the mercenary said, stepping out from behind the tree, ”I didn’t know a Mickey post could be so depressing.”

The mouse whipped his head around and sent a bewildered glare towards Deadpool. As if out of instinct, his metallic gauntlet self-equipped, and he snatched the broadsword from next to him and effortlessly swung it around is if it were a ribbon wand. “Who the heck are you?!” His voice carried a ferocity not approved by Disney.

Deadpool simply smirked. ”I’m the guy that’s going to bend your morals to the limit,” he snickered, holding up the crushed rat in his hand. ”I come to you with a peace offering—food for the night!”

The mouse’s eyes shot open as he gawked towards the deceased rat. “M-Minnie . . .”

”So . . . we setting up camp?”

The mouse pounced; the edge of his sword nearly swept across the mercenary’s nose, but with a strafe and duck, it failed to shed blood. Deadpool went to lever his shovel into Mickey’s skull—miss. The damn mouse was too fast. He summersaulted in the knick of time and threw his gauntleted hand in the mercenary’s direction.

Fuck me.

Psssssssseeeeeeerrrrruuuuuu!!!!!! the weapon cried as a beam streamed out from its circular core. It sped towards Deadpool, but as the words revealed themselves in his head, he took the shovel and cocked it back. Leg up, hips rotate—that’s a homerun, folks—his momentum guided his form, and he whipped the shovel across his body, smacking the beam out of the forest, out of the park, and into next week.

Mickey snarled. “You’re just a every-day thug!” The core of his gauntlet glowed a blue-hued white.

”Now, now, Mickey . . .” The mercenary knew what to do; he reached for into his bulging belt pocket. ”I’m think your jumping to conclusions now.” In a haste, he pulled the—now crimson—Furby out and held it forward.

The light from Mickey’s gauntlet dimmed down till it vanished completely. “What is that?” he inquired. His aggressive demeanor diluted as he viewed the children’s toy, with a pleasant curiosity.

Deadpool smiled. He uncurled his index from around the toy and pressed in its center—like before, it batted its eyes, perked its ears, and then flattened them. “I love you.”

Dante's Abyss Placings
2015 - 4th
2016 - 2nd
2017 - 4th


PVP Combat Record
(One-on-One)
3W - 0L - 0D
(TAG-TEAM)
4W - 1L - 0D
[Image: Deadpool_Funny.png]



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