The Omniverse
[NPC] Ambrosia Doesn't Need a Princess - Printable Version

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Ambrosia Doesn't Need a Princess - Guu - 07-07-2019

Sylvia Black was being hounded. Her days usually started this way.

The Second-in-Command of Ambrosia was confronted by a beagle and borzoi, eager to give their reports of that morning's council meeting. While the royal family still held power, they've long granted decisions to an elected Council. However, that doesn't stop them from giving Sylvia an earful everyday.

"Ms. Black! The Council would like to establish a road between New Leaf and Ambrosia!" Stated the beagle, bowing after every other word like he was worshipping some kind of deity.

The borzoi leaned in close on Sylvia's side. He lifts a monocle up to one of his eyes as he holds his top hat to keep it from falling. Considering how often he whips out that eyepiece of his, Sylvia had long guessed the guy really really wanted her to notice it. Further evidence seems to support this theory.

"While there is open field between here and New Leaf, we believe it's much better to have a path!" Said the Borzoi in the fakest British accent imaginable. "It'd preserve the nature a bit more if everyone was only going down one way, and it'll lessen the likely people will be lured into the haunted forest! Hop hop, Cheerio!"

The two stare intently at her, waiting.

She raised her teacup to her lips and took a sip, giving her a moment to think. She wasn't sure why these two even bothered with her opinion considering the Council was just going to go through with the plans either way. As she lowered her glass she peered down into a food, surely frozen solid in the time these two were taking up.

Moomoo milk waffles smothered with soul flavored-syrup. She wasn't sure who's brilliant idea was it to infuse artificial soul flavoring into everything now-a-days, but she's so done with it. The bottle was labeled "Haunted Forest Syrup." It's so stupid, it's not the tree sap that's haunted!

She looked across the table towards Molly, who was stabbing at her food forcefully, angrily peering over at the two dogs. Yeah, it's time to end this.

"Thank you my subjects for the update!" She stated. She usually didn't call people that, but like hell she would remember their names.

The two dogs looked at each other in silence before turning back to her. The borzoi's monocle fell into Sylvia's orange juice before shattering at the bottom of the glass. It was designed to shatter at any impact, it's part of the style.

"But what about your opinion?" Asked the beagle but he was cut off.

"I wish you good day, kind sirs!" Standing up and giving them in a curtsey in her sleeping clothes.

The two dogs, bow and head for the door. They were looking at each other with a silenced panic, as if her lack of opinion would break the whole city-state down from the foundation.

With the hounds out of the way, she peered over to Molly again. She stopped stabbing her food but she didn't seem any least despondent. Sylvia let out of a heavy sigh.

CLASH! "Ahhhhhhh!!!!"

A loud noise echoed through the hall followed by a yell. Sylvia's eyes peered towards the front door and bounding towards the dining room was a familiar Pink pony, a giant grin on her face. The second-in-command peered behind her and saw that the two dogs where knocked on their asses in front of the door.

"Pinkie!" She shouted at the pony, before lowering to a whisper "They were about to LEAVE!"

"Hey Sylvia! I'm here to take Molly to school! Is she ready?!?"

"Hold on!" Said Molly. She leapt out of her chair into the next room, a smile suddenly on a face as if the despondent attitude never existed. She snatched up her book bag and ran back to join the bouncy pony. "Okay, I'm ready!"

"I heard Ms. Rabbit is teaching Ambrosian history! Hehehe, you'll have to fill me in on how that goes! Did you know I met Princess Guu once?"

"Yes, I'm pretty sure I introduced her to you."

The Pink pony would ramble on as Molly fell behind. Sylvia watched as the little one took a moment to let a frown on her face slip before lifting a smiling facade again. Pinkie was none-the-wiser.


RE: Ambrosia Doesn't Need a Princess - Guu - 07-07-2019

It was a sunny day in Ambrosia, or at least it WAS! The pegasi were hard at work patching up the sky with cloud cover until it was a nice even overcast. What was a beautiful morning quickly turned into grey and gloomy. And then, the rain began to fall.

"Oh bloody hell!"

A skeleton in a big black hood sat at a diner table, looking up from his meal of artificial soul substitute in a can to notice the small storm brewing outside.

"I didn't hear about a storm being planned for today!" The skeleton grimaced as he watched the downpour.

A walrus sitting on the other side of him simply grunted and focused on his newspaper. It was the Ambrosian Chronicles. The Temmie Mafia made front page again, the orc attack the other day was Page 3. Guu updates once again gets bumped back to page 10. Still rotting in prison. No shock there.

His skeleton cohort didn't seem to appreciate the silence.

"I say, this town is heading down the crapper. Don't you think?" Spoke the embodiment of death.

"I'm quite comfortable where I am, Frank." The Walrus responded dully, flipping towards the funnies. Ambrosian comics have to be extra wacky to rival real life, so they tend to be quite the spectacle!

"Honestly, I've been thinking of moving my services somewhere else! Wouldn't that be nice Paul? I heard Camelot is pretty lovely this time of year!"

"Hah!" Paul responded, folding the newspaper and placing it in front of him. "You serious, bro? Camelot would eat you alive! What if Bonbon learned about you?"

"Fine! What about Coruscant? They've got aliens, I'd fit right in there!" Exclaimed Frank with a grin on his face!

"And the empire breathing down your neck." Stated the walrus.

"Agh! You're no fun!" The reaper huffed in exasperation. "What the heck am I supposed to do, huh? Ambrosia's economy is plummeting! How is anyone going to afford my services?"

"Ambrosia always bounces back." He responded, pointing a flipper at him.

"Ambrosia always bounces back because that good for nothing Guu keeps coming back! If she'd just stick around, people would actually be making money!" The grim said with a pained laugh. "And yet she choose prison over us!"

Paul said nothing at first, just giving Frank the sternest dead eye his peepers could muster. The skeleton tilted his head at the sight of his glare.

"What's your boggle?"

"My 'boggle' is that Guu has never done anything for us!" The blubberous man shouted.

A number of other patrons briefly glanced at the conversation being had, but quickly went back to their meals. Guu discourse was pretty common place at the Sty & Fry

"Gasp! How could you say that!" Screeched the Reaper.

"Did you literally just say 'gasp'" Paul said, deadpan. He was ignored

"Our best days have always been while Guu has been by our side!" He said, rattling his bones as he does a dramatic pose. "Ambrosia is nothing without our beloved princess!"

"Didn't you call her 'good for nothing-'" Paul didn't feel like that fight was worth it, simply facepalmed and moved onto his next point. "When was the last time Guu made a decision for Ambrosia?"

"Ummm, well!" The skeleton hesitated, biting an imaginary tongue. "She's not that kind of a leader! She gives us hope and spirit! How do you explain the boost in the economy each time she comes back!"

"Because she throws a huge party for us every time she comes back from her long sabbaticals, and that just feeds into the economy. Then she's already out the door before all the money could dry up. It's almost seems like it's intentional!"

"Intentional...?" Asked Frank, uncertain if he wants to hear the answer.

"Conspiracy, dude! She's doing it to look better! To make it look like we need her."

"But that's not true! We do need her! We need her more than anything!" Cried the skeleton.

"Whatever." Paul said. He opens up his newspaper and hides himself behind it.

The skeleton, seeing no way to convince his friend to side with Guu, he simply drooped down and took a big swig of his artificial soul. Suddenly, the walrus lowered the paper, just enough to see him over it's edges

"Oh yeah, what was it you do again?"

"Oh!" The reaper perked up at the question. "I sell life insurance!"


RE: Ambrosia Doesn't Need a Princess - Guu - 07-15-2019

Deep in the seedy underbelly of Ambrosia, a dark room sits patiently. It waits with a single table in it's center and fog machines hiding it's walls.

That's not for flavor, the room was literally sentient. It's a common saying amongst those that have spent any time in Ambrosia "The only place where the walls literally have eyes and they just want to be loved." But that's not important right now.

(Should be noted that not all walls are sentient. Just some of them are. -Ambrosia Tourism Board)

The room waited for their most favorite people to appear. It is seriously the highlight of their week. Almost made it worth it to have to constantly fight mold the the fog machines would frequently cause. Made it almost worth it to be situated next to the bathroom. Seriously, the bathroom makes a terrible neighbor; always grumpy all the time.

Their hypothetical heart skipped a beat as one of those favorite people appeared through the fog, their figure silhouetted until their form pierced the fog's surface.

She couldn't have been more than three feet tall. She walked on her tiny four legged frame barely supporting her giant spherical head, wagging her tail behind her. Her hair, messy and unkempt bounced along side the giant white furred balls that protruded from the sides of her face. Her cat ears twitched as they listened for her family. She peered down at her reflection on the table's polished surface. She straightened out her red bowtie, and swiped some lint off her pristine tux jacket with one of her paws.

Her ear twitched again, she straightened herself out. She couldn't help wagging her tail even faster in the excitement.

A number of other figures appeared from the fog, each of them barely even different from the last, each one bearing the same figure, the same jacket, though with differing colored ties.

The cat like creatures looked around the room and saw that everyone of their group was in attendance. Satisfied, all of them at once turned to greet their identical leader up front.

"Hoi Godtemmi!" Shouted the creatures.

"Hoi family! Temmie Mafia meet begin!" said the leader.

They all do a weird bow that looks way more silly than dignified. It was a challenge to not bang their heads against the desk with their huge face barely keeping up. After a second, they sit up straight and give all their attention to their glorious leader.

"Tem got a hit! Need to shoot snooty doggo! " Said the Godtemmie. She placed the weapon of choice on the table, a Nerf N-strike Longstrike CS-6 dart blaster. The other Temmies looked at it with complete awe, cooing in the way only a pack of nerds could make. "Take job to gets gun! Which Tem want it?"


"Temmie will!" Spoke up a green bowtied Temmie across from her.

The Godtemmie slid it across the table into the eager paws of the green temmie. The other Tems partially regret not speaking up, but they all knew the risk. Snooty doggo was a high profile target, and their ammo is literally made of foam. Their connections with the Ambrosia elite can only take them so far if a Tem got busted.

"Let's play Go Fish!" Said Godtemmie.

And the group cheered as they passed the cards around indiscriminately and there was much merriment. Green Temmie ducked out to carry out her mission, leaving her cheerful colleagues to enjoy their game.

The room watched with wonderment, a metaphorical smile on their face. They didn't care about the endless mold creeping up, and the bathroom complaining about a clog. At this moment, they were at bliss!